How does a guy make friends with other guys?

I've looked at your other questions, Marc, and see that you've moved to Phoenix -a place that doesn't lend itself to easy access to people. And you work in an office setting with people who are married or otherwise preoccupied socially. Bummer.

The problem with trying to "make friends" is sort of like the problem of "making money," that is, it is something which, if attempted DIRECTLY, almost never works. So, you need to target something that reflects an interest or passion, and then just LET friendships develop "accidentally." I'm going to give you a couple of sort of off-beat ideas to get you started.

Frist of all, let's look at the office AGAIN. Any golfers, fishermen, model railroaders, bowlers, woodworkers -or whatever- in there? What is your past-time preference? Or, is there something you'd LIKE to learn but aren't sure how to get started? You get my point -you need to find an area of common interest. Just for fun let's say you like to play golf -but hate going to the course to be put with a group of strangers. And so, at break time, lunch, or maybe on the office bulletin board, you ask who plays and talk up golf. Trust me, for that or any other past time, even married men enjoy time with guy friends and the fact that you're NOT married doesn't disqualify you. (Side note: if there is an office newsletter, offer to help with it -it is a way to get to know more about your fellow workers).

On a totally different angle: sign up for Habitat for Humanity, in which you build houses for people together with other volunteers. Doesn't matter if you don't know one end of a hammer from the other -you'll learn. Point is, it is a wonderful exposure to other people, and the opportunities to talk about your personal interest with other people abound. Because everyone is focused on getting a job done, there's no artificiality such as you've noticed in the "bar scene."

Too hot out there? Too physical? Join the local chapter of AAII (American Association of Individual Investors) to discusss investment strategies and the like.

Be a cop. I'm not kidding. Join "Crime Watch," get certified by the local sheriff or PD, go on patrol. "ride along" with real cops. Great way to get to know your neighbors. Or, join the volunteer fire department.

I don't know if you have any religious persuasions, but a church -especially a highly organized one- is a good way to get involved.

Point is this: something that is both volunteer AND something you LIKE automatically puts you with people of similar interests as yours. And the friendships will just "happen."

I'd be fascinated to know what you do and how it all works out.

Good luck, my friend.

try participating in a local sports team (like baseball or soccer). there also might be some social clubs that you can join. try looking it up in the yellow pages or the local newspapers.

maybe you're just one of those guys with lots of girl friends

i guess just talk to them, and find out if you have anything in common, or ask them if they want to go to the pub

Just try and be your self i mean if your a good guy and all it shouldn't be that hard

hey i have same question, will you tell them as well my problem.